Tag Archives: writing

Misused words.

I read something on MSN News that makes me wonder about journalists and their grasp of the English Language.

Here is the quote. “Despite being perhaps the most infamous royal abode, Buckingham Palace’s future is looking pretty questionable following news that the Queen has ‘permanently’ moved out.”

Can you see what’s wrong with it?

It’s the use of the word infamous. I also heard it used about the Sydney Opera House a month or so ago.

Buckingham palace is a well-known building, that’s for sure, but I don’t think it’s infamous. Not unless there have been some nasty goings-on there that I don’t know about.

Famous is the word that means well-known.

Infamous also means well-known, but for something bad.

Dick Turpin was an infamous highwayman.

The Cray Twins were infamous gang leaders in London.

The Wests were infamous murderers.

And so on.

Buckingham Palace is NOT an infamous royal abode.

I’ve just spent a weekend staying with my sister in North Wales, hence the rather brief and late post. I would usually have scheduled one, but didn’t get around to that either!

Hopefully I’ll be back to normal next week.

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Here’s a bit about the story.

Maria and her husband, Jack, have moved into an old cottage. They want to furnish it with period furniture and buy a medieval table.

That’s when the mystery begins. Strange sounds in the night. Have they bought a haunted house? But a medium tells them it is not a ‘lost spirit’, but something else she does not recognise.

What is it that is causing them to lose sleep? The answer is more unexpected than anyone thought.

Review of The Greenland Diaries, Day 1-100 by Patrick W. Marsh

Overview

I think that the title of this book is misleading. I thought it would be set in the country of Greenland, but it is set in Minnesota. I think that the Greenland refers to the growth of plants turning everything green. Perhaps if Mr Marsh had called it The Green Land Diaries, it would have been better.

Blurb

“It began with a drum. Then the monsters came. I’ve been hiding ever since.”

The following collections of journals were recovered from a caravan outside of Duluth, Minnesota. The exact date of recovery is not known nor is the origin of the speaker. The Bureau for the Restoration of History (BFRH) would like help in identifying the man who kept these records. This unedited record of events is still considered the most accurate history of the apocalypse that occurred on April 15th, 2011.

Story

Something came. The writer of the diaries calls them the Unnamed. Every night a drum sounds all night long, and then come the Unnamed. They seem to be intent on wiping out humankind. They search for them and tear them to pieces but they themselves are wispy and no-one can see their faces.

Accompanying them is a growth of vines that cover and wreck everything.

This is the story of how one man escaped from them. Sadly, though, it is all rather samey. There is an increase in the pace towards the end, though, and a few questions were asked, but none were answered. I feel that even in a series, there should be some sort of closure at the end.

There are 4 books in the series, and I don’t think I can manage to go through 4 books in order to discover what the Unnamed are and where they came from. (Besides, the ebook is rather expensive at £4.33)

Characters

This mainly revolves around one man—the writer of the diaries. His character is rather flat, and he doesn’t change much throughout the book. There are a few other characters. An old man called Gerald, whom the protagonist becomes friends with, a young boy called Timothy who is not what he seems, and an older man called Francis, who is also an enigma.

The best character is the protagonist’s little dachshund, called Snowy. (Yes, it’s an odd name for a brown dog, but it is explained in the story.)

Writing

The writing is not good. There is an overuse of the word ‘just’, which to me screams Amateur. Far too many superfluous prepositions, and many spelling mistakes. (scrapping instead of scraping, for example.) Mr Marsh also uses wrong words in some places and does not know when to use ‘lay’, and when to use ‘lie’. Some people might be able to ignore these things, but I find it grates and spoils my reading experience.

Conclusion

This book could have been shorter. If the others are the same, then, with the elimination of the superfluous words and speeding up the action, it could probably have been fitted into three books and be a better read. The premise is good, and this book could be excellent and very scary, but the writing lets it down.

I give it only 2*

Have you read this book? If you have , I would be interested in your thoughts about it. There are quite a number of positive reviews on Amazon and Goodreads. How much does the writing matter?

Leave your comments in the comments box, please.

How about a free, exclusive story? You can get one, by me, by clicking on the link below.

Maria and her husband, Jack, have moved into an old cottage. They want to furnish it with period furniture and buy a medieval table.

That’s when the mystery begins. Strange sounds in the night. Have they bought a haunted house? But a medium tells them it is not a ‘lost spirit’, but something else she does not recognise.

What is it that is causing them to lose sleep? The answer is more unexpected than anyone thought.

By clicking on the link, you will join my quarterly newsletter. But don’t worry, you can unsubscribe at any time, including as soon as you have downloaded the story, if you wish.

I won’t spam you, either. You will only get a newsletter every 3 months, but I might occasionally send you a present, or some exciting news, like a new release.

bramble, the dog

I don’t usually interview animals, but today I’m welcoming a dog to my blog. Rather than ask him questions, I think I’ll allow him the freedom to tell you about himself in his own words.

Hi. My name’s Bramble and I’m a dog.

I’m quite a big dog. At least I’m bigger than the others I lived with. I’m what humans call black and tan.

I live in the pages of a book, or rather, a series of books, called The Wolves of Vimar, and you’ll meet me first in book 1, The Wolf Pack.

Let’s get back to me and my life.

After Borolis came and took me from my mother, I cried. I cried quite a lot. He took me to his farm where I met three other dogs, his wife and three children.

His wife, a kind woman, was called Elpin and they had three children, twin boys called Krom and Voldon, and a sweet little girl called Amerilla. I loved that little girl. She was kind to a frightened, lonely puppy.*looks sad*

I learned about the smells on the farm: which belonged to the other farm animals and which were enemies’ scents. There were wolves that tried to take the larger animals, and foxes that would try to get the hens. The big dogs chased them off. Sometimes a big bird, called an eagle, tried to pick up a lamb. Those big birds scared me when I was little. One of them could easily carry me off and eat me.

Once, Nettle, a large black dog, who led the pack, managed to catch and kill a fox. It didn’t taste good when we tried to eat it, though.

This is Nettle.

My humans smelled good. Borolis smelled of fields and hay. There was also a lingering smell of horse about him. Elpin smelled of cooking and kindness, while the twins smelled almost the same as each other. I can’t tell you why, but their scent reminded me of adventure and fun.

But Amerilla—ah, little Rilla, as they called her—she was special. She had a light scent. Candles, sugar, spices. I loved that little girl. *whine*

The other two dogs, another black, called Bracken, and a black and white one called Bandit, all obeyed Nettle. He was fierce if they didn’t give him priority, and showed his teeth.

Bracken
Bandit


I didn’t cross him either, even though I was now bigger than him. He could be scary.

One day, I went to the water trough for a drink. As I drank, Nettle approached and growled at me to let him drink first. I was thirsty and ignored him, so he attacked me.

He knocked me from the trough and stared at me. I stared back, and began to growl. He walked stiff-legged in my direction, growling in response to my growl. I could smell the aggression coming from him, and knew he meant to put me in my place, once and for all.

Once he was bigger than me, but now I’d grown. I leaped at him and bit his ear. Blood flowed as his ear tore. He tried to bite my neck, but I grabbed his jaw and held on.

I shook his head from side to side, and he began to make puppy noises. That didn’t affect me. I knew this was a fight for leadership in our little pack. He’d bullied me for long enough.

I bit harder, and tasted blood. It tasted like iron horseshoes smelled.
I released my grip and tried to grab his neck, but was too slow. He managed to bite me in my shoulder as I dodged, and I felt blood trickling through my fur.

Then I leaped and got him onto the ground. I seized his neck and shook. I didn’t want to kill him. Not really, but I would have done so if necessary. He whined again. I don’t think the other dogs had ever challenged him and he didn’t like this fight that was going against him.

He rolled onto his back in surrender. I walked away, back to the trough and took a drink, watching him out of the corner of my eye.

He slunk away to wait until I’d finished before slaking his own thirst.
It was then I knew I was now leader of the farm dogs.

I believe I was a good alpha male.

This was my life until I ended up with the group of people who call themselves Wolf. Wolves have very little to do with it, but this group of humans decided to call themselves Wolf for some reason.

I made a brief appearance in The Wolf Pack, but I didn’t think that was enough for a dog like me, and so I told the author, V.M.Sang, I thought I should have more to do.

She kindly added me to the second book, and I’m also in the third. I’m hoping to be in the fourth, too, although at the moment she seems to be more concerned with a stupid, irresponsible little dragonet, called Muldee. If I could catch him, I’d chew him up a bit.

I think Muldee also asked her if he could have a bigger role than the one he had in Book 1. She’s too soft with these characters, if you ask me. She also let in Grimmaldo, who’s a friend of Carthinal, and someone who didn’t even appear in Book 1! Called The Cat, of all things. That’s something I’d never want to call myself.

You can find out more about Wolf, and why they call themselves that by reading The Wolf Pack.


You can buy it from Amazon in a variety of formats, including Audio.
V.M. tells me that if you click on the link below, it will take you to Amazon wherever you are. Sounds very clever to me. How does it know where you are?

Thank you, Bramble. It was good to have you here on my blog.

I would love to hear your opinions. Please leave any comments in the comments box.

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Tolkien’s Lord of The Rings & The Similarities With Being a Writer #MondayBlogs

I came across this fun post yesterday on Lucy Mitchell’s blog and thought I’d share it with you all.

I’m in the NaNoWriMo trenches and it’s been a tough weekend. At one point things got so challenging I started procrastinating about how the life of a writer feels very similar to Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings.

Here are the similarities with Lord of the Rings and being a writer:

  • Your story is the ring and you secretly believe that in the right hands it could bring you great literary power.

Continue reading here

my favourite #reading place

We planted a vine in our garden when we moved into the house. It has now become a lovely shady spot for sitting and reading. The leaves shade your eyes so that it’s possible to read without squinting.

For visually impaired readers, the picture shows a garden bench against a fence with some patches of ivy growing up it, and the trunk of a vine. On the bench is a pair of spectacles and a book. the book cover shows a young man with shoulder-length auburn hair. The background is a pale blue with the shadow of a wolf behind the young man.

The book on the bench is The Wolf Pack, which was my first ever book to be published. It is the first of a series that I’ve entitled The Wolves of Vimar (Vimar being the world where the action takes place).

The story is based on a Dungeons and Dragons scenario I wrote, but in the writing, it changed somewhat. Some places where certain things happened in the scenario I moved to somewhere else in the book.

I was excited to hear from Next Chapter that it has been translated into French and Spanish, too.

The Wolf Pack tells of a group of people, unknown to each other in the beginning, who are commissioned to go and find a magical sword that used to belong to the legendary king, Sauvern. Its whereabouts has been lost for many centuries.

There are surprises and dangers to be encountered in the tale. Death is never far away, and help comes in unexpected ways. Every character has to confront their fears, and they are all changed by their experiences.

Due to the very different characters, there are arguments and confrontations on the way as well.

The book has been generally well received and is currently number 47 in Teen and Young Adult Fantasy Interactive Fiction. (Although I didn’t write it as a teen book, and it’s not interactive! Still, who knows the workings of the Great Zon!)

Here is one of the reviews it received in the USA:

John Thornton 5.0 out of 5 stars

A solidly done, and crafted fantasy novel

“The Wolf Pack” is an original and well crafted fantasy novel. If you like novels like the “Earthsea Saga” by Ursula Le Guin or “When the Heavens Fall” by Marc Turner then I suggest that you may well enjoy “The Wolf Pack.” British style and spellings throughout. Not really a negative, just a difference to be noted.

I found the characters well developed, and complex (in a good way).

The plot is unique and unusual. It is not easy to explain, but does unfold nicely as one reads through the book. I am trying to avoid spoilers, so I do not want to give too much away.

Dialogue is well written and each character has his or her own voice.

If you are interested in purchasing this book, it is available in ebook and paperback format. You can buy it by clicking on the cover in the sidebar or here. This will take you to Amazon where you are.

If you read the book, please leave a review. Reviews are the lifeblood of authors as they are the best way to let people know about books, good or bad, so people will have an idea if they will enjoy it.

I welcome any comments you wish to make. Please add them to the comments box.

Some alternative words to use for the senses

Image by Neofir72 from Pixabay

We are often told, as writers, that we should try to use all the senses in order to bring our stories to life. We have 5 senses (although some people say there is a 6th, and some stories deal with it, including some of my own) and it’s a good idea to change the word to describe the way the character experiences the sense.

We could say ‘He saw the dragon descending to its lair.’ But we could make it stronger by using a different word (or phrase). ‘He became aware of the dragon descending to its lair.’

In the above picture, we would be able to smell the vegetation, hear the birds singing and the rippling water. We see the green of the plants and the brownish colour of the water. We could dabble our feet in the water and feel the coolness, or the grass under our feet when we get out.

I’m not sure about taste, here, but if we know what we are doing, we could taste some of the plants. I know I’ve done so when I was young. the sweet taste of blades of grass when chewed or the nectar in the base of clover florets.

Here are some ideas you could use instead.

Image by Sofie Zbořilová from Pixabay

Sight:

become aware of, detect, discern, distinguish, give the impression of, identify, look, look like, note, notice, observe, perceive, realize, recognize, reveal, seem, sense, sight, spot, watch

Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

Smell:

scent, sniff, inhale, detect,

Image by PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay

Hearing:

catch, eavesdrop, overhear, listen to,

Image by Tumisu from Pixabay

Touch:

feel, handle, stroke, caress, fondle, paw, grope, rub, run fingers over, run hands over.

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

Taste:

savour, sip, nibble, sample, try, lick

Do you use all the senses when you describe a scene? It certainly brings it to life.

Please leave a comment in the comments box.

review of argentum by Debbie Manber Kupfer

Argentum (The P.A.W.S.Saga Book 2) by [Kupfer, Debbie Manber]


**** stars

Overview

This is the second book in Debbi Manber Kuyper’s P.A.W.S. Saga, and it begins where book 1 finished. It is a tale of shapeshifters, werewolves and animagi.
P.A.W.S. is the place where these beings live. There are many such places all over the world.
Werewolves are humans that have been infected with lycanthropy, and are forced to become wolves at the full moon. Animagi can change their shape at will into an animal, while shapshifters require a charm passed down through families, and originally made by Merlin himself.
In this second book, we take up the story where the eveil werewolf, Alistair, has been destroyed.
Or has he?

Blurb


Argentum is the thread that binds all magic …
The silver of Miri’s cat charm passed on through the generations.
The silver of Jessamyn’s scepter, the source of her illusions.
The silver of Quentin’s scrying bowl, forged by Merlin.
All intertwine in Argentum.

With Alistair gone a measure of peace returns to P.A.W.S., but Miri is tormented by nightmares. The silver charm that had recently hung around Alistair’s neck is now in Miri’s possession and seems to have taken on a life of its own. And then it mysteriously disappears.
Jessamyn seeks help from Quentin, who claims to have repented his past association with Alistair, but can he be trusted?
And what of Jenna? The young girl rescued from Alistair’s pack house holds a terrible secret. One that could determine the future of P.A.W.S.

Story


I found the story to be as immersing as the first book. Miri’s growing romance with the shapeshifter, Danny, whose alterego is a large maine coon cat, plays a big part in the story.
There is also a mystery about how her friend Josh’s mother has a photograph that looks like one she has of her grandmother when she was young.
The story, I found captivating, and wanted to know more about the whereabouts of Miri’s second charm that had belonged to her grandfather, and who took it. Was the dead Alistair influencing events? And how could this be?

Characterisation.


The characters in the book are realistic. They all have their good and bad points, just like real people. Perhaps they did not develop as much as they could have, but then there are 5 books to get through. Perhaps they will be changed by the end of the 5th book.

Writing.


This is the weakest part of the book. While the style is easy to read, I found a number of grammar mistakes that should really have been discovered and corrected in the editing stage.

Conclusion


All in all, in spite of the grammar errors, the story is good, and so I decided to only remove 1 star from my review.

A Writer's Year

As it’s my last post of 2019, I thought I’d sum up my writing year.

This year I’ve been quite busy. I decided I’d write some prequels to my Wolves of Vimar series, some of which I serialised here. I originally thought I’d write them as short stories, but they have grown into novellas.

I wrote the back stories of Asphodel, and Kimi and Davrael. When I decided to submit them to Next Chapter, the publisher who published The Wolves of Vimar series as far as it’s got, I thought I should begin with the story of how Carthinal came into being. I told the tale of his parents. It’s a rather tragic story. I’ve now submitted it to Next Chapter, and am waiting for their next move.

I finished Vengeance of a Slave, my very first Historical Novel, submitted it and it is now live on Amazon. (http://mybook.to/voas/ ) It was released on Boxing Day. If any of you decide to purchase and read it, I would be grateful if you could post a review.

Researching this book, and the next one, Jealousy of a Viking, took a lot of time. Although some research is needed, even for fantasy novels, to get the history right, and the background is much more exacting. This book is not yet ready for publishing. It’s needs much more polishing before I submit it.

Earlier in the year I lost a lot of Book 4 of The Wolves of Vimar, and I searched all my places on my computer and also online. I felt demoralised by this, having lost several chapters. Then, out of the blue, I looked in one cloud storage I’d not looked in. In fact, I didn’t know I’d stored anything there, but there it was! Hooray!

I started working on it again, but it’s coming on rather slowly. This is because I started working on the backstory of Carthinal from The Wolves. This novella isn’t yet ready for submitting to Next Chapter. In fact it’s not quite finished, but I hope I’ll get it done shortly after the New Year. Then I can finish Book 4, probably to be called Immortal’s Death.

Next year I hope to release more of the novellas—Davrael and Kimi and Asphodel. I also hope to get Jealousy of a Viking released and finish Immortal’s Death. Quite a big task to get it all done.

I also have another fantasy novel that I started a couple of years ago that I want to finish, then there’s the on-going saga of the descendants of Adelbehrt from Vengeance of a Slave and Jealousy of a Viking. The next one is to be in Britain just after William the Conqueror beat Harold at the Battle of Hastings. Not sure of a title yet.

So that’s my year.

Thank you for following my blog, and to those of you who bought my books, a big thanks. I would be grateful for any reviews. They are most helpful, not only to me, but also to potential readers so they can tell if the book is for them.

You can purchase any of the books by clicking on the cover in the sidebar.

Please leave a comment in the comments box. I love to hear your thoughts.

Review of Write it Right by Mary Deal *****

Mary Deal has produced a book that every aspiring author, and even those with experience, should read.


She deals with every aspect of writing, from the beginning, when the book is just the germ of an idea, to the end, when the book is published and the dreaded marketing begins.


If you have no other book on writing, this should be the one you buy. It should be required reading for every author.

The book is easy to read, with no complicated explanations. She talks about the importance of editing and getting your manuscript the best it can be. She mentions how you can improve your plot, and how important characters are in getting the poblic to read and enjoy. Then she goes into the best ways of formatting your book for publishing, and the importance of the cover art.


There is little or nothing she doesn’t cover in this amazing book. If you are a writer, or an aspiring one, buy this book now.

I give it 5 stars.